How do make my hair shiny and soft?

My hair is Damaged and dry. On the sides it gets really poofy after i take a shower. The top of my hair is shiny and perfect but as you go down it become dryer. I barely use heat on my hair, about once every two months and i don't over wash my hair. I use moose on my hair but not a lot, it doesn't really help the frizz go down. I have wavy hair. As i said before its the sides of my hair that i have a problem with, It just poofs up.. Any advice on what i should do?